A General Consensus: VAMPIRES SUCK is a Waste of Time and Money

As a personal opinion and also part of my sort of critique of it, I think the TWILIGHT series is one of the silliest things to come out of cinema, and I can also see how hilariously dumb this series can be, if ever somebody would make a spoof or parody of it. But that does not mean that all Twilight jokes are funny. If you enjoy watching Twilight jokes that are NOT funny, VAMPIRES SUCK must be the movie for you.

It appears that the whole world agrees that VAMPIRES SUCK is CORNY. Obviously because this movie is directed by the corniest film directors on Earth: the directorial duo of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer.

Bill Gibron of filmcritic.com says: "This movie, from these no talent writer/directors Friedberg and Seltzer, fails to find anything remotely winning with its hunt and peck sense of humor. While the subject provides ample opportunity for full on spoofing (including the mannered acting work of Twilight throbs Stewart, Pattinson, or Lautner), Friedberg and Seltzer come up short -- incredibly bad movie short. They aim low...and then miss. Vampires Suck should have been the final word on all things Team Edward and Jacob. Instead, it ends up being nothing more than Team Terrible."

John Gholson of Cinematical.com says "Vampires Suck is almost bad enough to make me pity the Twilight film series for being the subject of such limp, toothless mockery"

On Spill.com, Korey Coleman said on his audio review of Vampires Suck that his harsh criticism and self-proclaimed hatred of Friedberg and Seltzer comes from the fact that he believes that their films are lowering the standards of the spoof genre and cinema in general. Korey Coleman then offered $500 to anyone who physically assaults Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, $1000 if they capture the assault on camera.

There are so many Twilight jokes and parodies on Youtube, funnier than the jokes of Vampires Suck, it's a shame that a film company actually spent money to produce something from the (tested and proven) corniest writer/directors working in Hollywood. In the website Rottentomatoes.com where a consensus of numerous film reviews are posted, Vampires Suck scores a 6% in rating. Probably the lowest rated movie this year so far. So before you go and spend more than a hundred peso for this movie, go ask yourself; are you going to be wasting your money and time for this garbage?

Spider-man 4 & Raimi No More

Producers attempt to meddle in creative process ends in the firing of director Sam Raimi and rebooting Spider-man series

Bad news to Spider-man fans. The upcoming Spider-man 4 is scrapped, kicking out Sam Raimi, Tobey Maguire, et al., and rebooting the series instead. EW reports that Sony wants “a more gritty, contemporary redo of the series,”

But this is Spider-man, not Daredevil or Batman, or the Punisher. You don't need a Spider-man movie to be dark to be good. In fact, forcing it to be dark and gritty may even possibly make this a bad movie.

EW also reports that Sony was always aiming to reboot the series in 2012 no matter what, but they did want one last outing with Raimi, Maguire, and co. According to Collider.com's Matt Goldberg, "this means that Sony just pushed up the timetable on setting up a crappy precedent where they don’t have to use over forty years of material from the comics, but can just keep redoing the series to suit the demographic with the most purchasing power at the time. That’s why when Sony means Peter Parker is going back to high-school, it means they’re skewing towards the Twilight crowd because they know the fanboys will nut up, take it, and then complain about it after they’ve already paid x-amount of dollars to see it (most likely in 3D; Sony hasn’t announced that for this new movie, but it’s a safe assumption they’ll jump on that bandwagon as well)."

In my opinion, what made the Spider-man movies successful was the masterful direction of Sam Raimi, who is a true fan of the Spider-man comics ever since his childhood. If you ask me, before Dark Knight came out, I had considered Spider-man 2 to be THE best superhero movie. But the third movie, Spider-man 3 was a critical failure because it was already there on that stage that the producers started to meddle with the creative process of making the movie; it was here when they began barking orders to Raimi to utilize their own ideas instead of Raimi's. It would be logically surmised that Raimi would not let this failure be repeated when they set out to make Spider-man 4. Now, the producers have fired him and want a new director they could easily bark orders to.

SM Cinema Iloilo releases advance screening skeds for NEW MOON

Twilight fan girls listen up! Well everybody knows that New Moon is opening tomorrow. SM City Cinema Iloilo has released in advance its screening skeds for the movie. It will be released in three theaters (as expected). Twilight (2): New Moon will be shown in Cinemas 2, 3, & 4. And here are their screening skeds:

Cinema 2
12:40 PM, 3:10, 8:10 PM
Cinema 3
11:50 AM, 2:20 PM, 4:50, 7:20 PM
Cinema 4
11 AM, 1:30 PM, 9:00 PM

Schedules are subject to change without prior notice
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